


Flirting? Maybe?

by orphan_account



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Awkward Boners, Awkward Flirting, Flirting, M/M, Public Blow Jobs, Under-Desk Blow Jobs, Weird flirting, like really what the hell Ray
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-27
Updated: 2017-04-27
Packaged: 2018-10-24 16:57:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10745946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Baby can’t you see? I’m callin’. A guy like you should wear a warning. It’s dangerous, I’m fallin’.





	Flirting? Maybe?

The rumors about the Fake AH Crew spoke of a fearsome gang containing the best of the best.

The main crew having a leader who was ruthless and cutthroat. Anyone who dared to face him ended up dead. The second in command was just as bad. She was a femme fatale, the getaway driver, but pray for anyone who believed that was all she was. Rumor was, she once tore out someone’s throat with her bare nails, sharpened to points.

The others in the main crew were only known as the Lads. One of them known for a fiery temper and a blood lust for death and destruction unmatched in the city. In his wake he left demolished buildings and hundreds dead. The next was only know as the Golden Boy of the crew. They said he could charm entire gangs with only his words and those who dared to touch a hair on his head would turn up dead, tormented to death. A sniper was the third of the Lads. People spoke of a pink sniper rifle and a purple hoodie. They said that the sniper was an agent of death and that was why he could disappear without a trace. Some said he didn’t have a face and that was why no one had ever seen his face. Or maybe they just never lived long enough to show anyone else. The final of the Lads was a man who had moved up from their lower ranks. He was known for his gaudy outfit of purple and orange. Rumor was that he didn’t even need a gun to take down men.

The lower ranked of the group had their own rumors, but they stayed in the shadows so much no one knew much truth about them. Some thought they were the secret to the crew’s success and that was why no one heard much about them. Others spoke about the lower crew having been its own crew before being absorbed by the Fakes.

The rumors differed from person to person except one. Don’t fuck with the Fakes.

So, when Ryan joined the Fakes as the Vagabond he kept his mask on and his identity as secret as possible. He didn’t want to accidentally do something to anger the crew and wind up dead. If they came for him, Ryan planned on disappearing and moving towns. So, he kept his façade of being silent and deadly up as he met them, as he was lead to their main base of operations, as their leader Geoff shook his hand, but Ryan almost lost it when he saw the Lads playing Mario Party on a couch. Ryan couldn’t believe his eyes of ears when he heard their Golden Boy whine and coo “Micoo” at their demolitions expert.

The man in the purple hoodie was hardly even paying attention to the screen, playing both Mario Party and someone on a bright pink DS.

A woman, the second in command had walked in shortly after that and started nagging them about eating properly and turning down the volume so they didn’t deafen themselves. The Lads started throwing balls of paper at Geoff until the man’s eye was twitching and he yelled that they were all fired.

Suffice to say, Ryan didn’t know how he was supposed to react to it all. Was it some kind of joke? Some tactic to throw Ryan off his game?

Over the next few months, Ryan discovered that no it wasn’t some kind of façade. The most feared crew in the entire city acted like a bunch of children and Ryan wasn’t sure if he was impressed that they managed to function with the way they were or if he was appalled that that was the crew he had chosen to join after being a freelancer for so long.

They hadn’t even gone on a heist since Ryan joined and if he was honest, Ryan was going a little stir crazy.

That wasn’t even the worst of it though. Apparently Ray, the infamous sniper, had decided that it would be a fun game to play “annoy Ryan until he isn’t sure if he wants to strangle the younger man or if he wanted to pin him up against a wall and ravish him until he couldn’t stand up.”

It wasn’t even like Ray was doing anything bad. He was just saying really weird things to Ryan. One time Ryan was in the kitchen getting a diet coke and as soon as Ryan stood up straight Ray was right up against him and whispered in a sing song voice into Ryan’s ear, “If I said I want your body now, would you hold it against me?” As Ryan blushed, thankful he’d left his mask on, Ray just laughed a little before turning and walking away, playing his DS like nothing had happened.

Another time Ryan was just walking down the hall when he was suddenly grabbed and pinned to the wall in an impressive show of strength. Ray grinned like he could tell how Ryan blushed before singing, “Meet me in the boudoir, make my body say ah ah ah, I like it,” while rolling his hips against Ryan’s before once again disappearing while Ryan tried to figure out how to say something without stuttering.

Later that same night Ryan found a sticky note in his room that read, “so many things I would do if I had my way with you,” along with what was apparently a dick picture. Ryan wouldn’t admit the feeling of blood rushing to his own cock at the image paired with the words.

Finally, Ryan got tired of it and went to Geoff to find out what was going on. Ryan wouldn’t deny that he was interested in the things Ray had said, but well he wasn’t sure if it was some weird form of hazing or what.

“What’s up, dude?” Geoff asked as Ryan entered his office.

Ryan fidgeted nervously before just saying, “Ray has been… uh saying weird things to me like this and also sort of put a dick pic in my room and I’ve got to say this is the weirdest form of hazing I’ve ever experienced.”

Looking at the sticky note, Geoff started laughing uncontrollably before saying, “This is a lyric to a so- Fuck Jeremy stop that!”

Suddenly a head of brown and green hair appeared from under the desk and it took all of Ryan’s power to not to just turn around and walk out of the office.

Jeremy didn’t seem deterred by the fact that he’d been caught giving a blow job to Geoff and just grabbed the post-it before saying, “Yeah these are lyrics to a song called Hatefuck. Man Ray’s got a weird way of flirting, but it’s hilarious to watch him do it at a bar.”

“Flirting?” Ryan questioned, sounding far too much like a school girl for his liking.

A look of surprise appeared on Jeremy’s face as he said, “Yeah. You didn’t know? Buddy like two days after you joined us Ray said he was going to have sex with you.”

“Oh,” Ryan said. Thinking about it for a second, Ryan decided that he didn’t have a problem with the idea of fooling around with Ray. “Well uh… you guys have fun then.”

As Ryan awkwardly left the office he heard a moan leave Geoff’s mouth and prayed that he’d be able to never hear that noise again.

Later that day Ryan spotted Ray go into his room and a quick plan formed in his mind. Knocking on the door, Ryan remembered the line he’d memorized from one of the songs Ray had quoted and waited. As soon as Ray opened the door, Ryan pushed into the room, slamming the door shut before pushing Ray up against the door roughly. The gasp that left Ray solidified Ryan’s plan to do that. “If I put my hands around your wrists, would you fight them? If I put my fingers in your mouth, would you bite them?”

The smirk that played on Ray’s lips made Ryan’s stomach flutter as Ray said, “I thought you’d never ask.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Have you ever written something and been like yeah this'll be cool and cute? That's how this started. I don't think that's how it ended, but you know I tried. I've written over 5000 words in German the past week along with a 7 page research paper. I'm dead inside.


End file.
